MORNING CHAT/ Done is better than perfect

Is there a little perfectionism devil inside of you? I’ve been on that roller coaster for a while in the past. Today I want to chat about how important it is to know when to stop and when “done” starts being better than “perfect”.


english

From experience, I believe we start being a bit harsh to ourselves sometime in high school when our sanity and conscience starts working. The competition starts, we must do better, we need to be better and it’s never good enough. Of course there are always kids in the school who don’t give a s**t and I wish I was one of those, at least at some points. Instead, I thought that I need to be the best even tough I knew it was a lot of hard work for me. Finally, in the end of the last high school year I succeeded – I had an A. And gastritis, too.

Falling into perfectionism circle is like Alice falling into Wonderland – you become tiny and perfectionism a whole you can’t find a way out of. Soon it starts making you feel like nothing you do is good, which is nothing but one big fat lie that brain loves to message you, as much as possible. Talking about perfect, maybe you can “hit” a yes on this one too – I always had to have a plan (mmm, have is maybe more realistic) and everything had to work out how I imagined (that one is slowly changing). It’s hard to explain it, but it actually makes me a bit anxious and nervous when I don’t know how my future will look like. Do you know that feeling? I feel safe with a plan and strategy.  I am miles away from a very spontaneous person but hey, that’s me.

They say people who like to have control often are the same ones who polish every single thing until it’s perfect. That’s me too, way less than before, thanks god! Oh that is something that used to annoy me to the extreme – when you imagine it one way and then it doesn’t want to turn out like that. And then you re-work, re-work, re-work, time flies, it’s 4 in the morning, you are still not satisfied with a background color in your Power Point presentation and this sentence on slide 4 sounds a bit weird, maybe you should come up with something else. Soon you realize that your presentation was perfect and that you feel like a dry sponge. Was it worth it?

In rare cases maybe but in every other, absolutely not. First working day at my current job I walked into the office and it front of me on the board there was a paper with a message: “Done is better than perfect”. Explain me this, if that wasn’t a message from heaven. Just a small reminder of what actually matters – time, efficiency, done work and moving on to the next one.No one cares is the background of the PP presentation is light or dirty pink. Don’t get me wrong, that was the lightest example that I could have taken.

I am writing this not only to remind myself, but also because I’m wondering how many of my readers can relate. Is there a little perfect devil in every one of us? And where and when does perfect become a victim of perfect? Knowing and listening to our mind and body is the biggest gift you can be given and it’s the key to that magical door that leads back from “perfect” to “done” – and done is always good enough.


heart carrosel


croatian

Iz iskustva vjerujem da počinjemo biti strogi prema sebi nekad u srednjoj školi kad nam savjest proradi. Krenu natjecanja, moraš odraditi bolje, trebaš odraditi bolje i nikad nije dovoljno dobro. Uvijek ima onih koje boli briga za sve i da sam barem bila jedna od tih, barem u nekim trenucima. Totalno suprotno, mislila sam da trebam biti bolja od najboljeg iako sam bila svjesna da to iziskuje puno rada s moje strane. Na kraju zadnje školske godine sam napokon uspjela – sve petice na svjedodžbi. Aha, i gastritis.

Padanje u krug perfekcionizma je kao Alisa koja je pala u Zemlju Čudesa – ti postaješ minijatura, a perfekcionizam rupa iz koje je teško naći izlaz. Ubrzo počneš osjećati da sve što radiš nije dovoljno dobro, što je ništa drugo nego jedan obična debela laž koju mozak obožava slati, više puta dnevno. Kad već pričam o perfekcionizmu, možda isto možete staviti kvačicu na ovo – oduvijek sam morala imati plan (mmm, moram je možda realističnije) i sve je trebalo proći onako kako sam si ja zamislila (ovo se polako mijenja). Teško je objasniti, ali zapravo sam nervozna kad mi je budućnost zamagljena, volim imati kontrolu nad svime. Znati li taj osjećaj? Ja sam u sigurnoj zoni s planom i strategijom. Ja sam, isto tako, miljama daleko od spontane osobe, ali hej, to sam ja.

Kažu da ljudi koji vole imati kontrolu nad stvarima su iste one picajzle koje provode sate polirajući – sve. To sam isto ja, hvala bogu daleko manje nego ikad prije. E to je nešto što me znalo totalno izbaciti iz takta – kad ti zamisliš jedno, ali neće pa neće. I onda ispočetka, popravljaš, prerađuješ, vrijeme curi, 4 ujutro je, još uvijek nisi zadovoljan s pozadinom u svojoj PP prezentaciji i ova rečenica na četvrtom slajdu zvuči čudno, možda da zamijeniš s nečim drugim. Tvoja prezentacija je bila savršena, a ti si ocijeđena spužva. Jel’ vrijedilo?

U rijetkim slučajevima možda, ali u svakom drugom apsolutno nije. Prvi radni dan na mom sadašnjem poslu sam primjetila kad sam sjela za svoj stol neki papir na ploči na kojem piše: “Done is better than perfect”. Objasnite mi to, ako to nije bila poruka s neba. Samo mali podsjetnik na ono što zbilja vrijedi – vrijeme, učinkovitost, odrađen posao i selidba na idući. I nikog nije briga jel’ pozadina prezentacije baby ili prljavo roza. Nemojte me krivo shvatiti, ovo je najblaži primjer koji sam mogla uzeti.

Pišem ovaj post ne samo da podsjetim sebe, nego me isto tako zanima koliko se vas može poistovijetiti. Ima li svatko od nas tog perfekcionističkog vraga iznutra? I gdje i kada savršen postaje žrtva savršenog? Poznavanje i slušanje svog uma i tijela je najveći dar koji možemo imati i to je taj ključ, ključ za magična vrata koja vode natrag iz “savršenog” u “odrađeno” – i odrađeno je uvijek dovoljno dobro.


xoxo

A.

square mile of style blog

2 thoughts on “MORNING CHAT/ Done is better than perfect

  1. To je taj unutarnji kritičar kojeg imam i ja. Ne vjerujem da ga svatko ima, ali ogromna većina nas – sigurno. Hvala na ovom postu, znam da kasnim, ono, 8-9 mjeseci, ali ne zamjeri, tek sam otkrila blog!

    Liked by 1 person

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